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Parents Sharing the Nembutsu With Their Young

Children

I believe that as parents we need to take a more active role in the religious development of our children, especially before they become teenagers, and while they still listen to us! The contents of this booklet reflect my own efforts and struggles as I try to share and live the Nembutsu (referring to one’s personal appreciation of the Jodo-Shinshu teachings) with my three young children. One thing is sure, my children have taught me so much about my own self, especially my shortcomings.

One of the most difficult parts of parenting is the balancing of love and discipline: when to hug and when to scold, when to con- sole and when to punish. My wife and I are now quite convinced that love is far more important than discipline. When a child feels the parents unconditional love, he or she generally needs less disciplining in the long run. Often, the need for discipline increases precisely because there is not enough love! I now appreciate the bumper sticker that inquires, “Have you hugged your child today?”

Shinran Shonin speaks of Buddha nature and how even the plants, trees, and land become Buddhas. I, therefore, try to see my own children as “potential Buddhas.” This has helped me to yell at them only once rather than three times!

I work on the premise that a good Jodo-Shinshu Buddhist will make a good parent. I make this statement not because a “good” Buddhist is a paragon of virtue, but because that parent will be much more self-reflective, open and flexible. Such a parent will surely be

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